Sprints Gives You an Escape from All the SEC Expansion News // 08.16.11

Why do Georgia football players still have scooters?
I mean, really, sometimes it's like Mark Richt is trying to get fired. He might become the first coach who landed on the hot seat at least partly because of his players' choice of motor vehicle.

Ray Drew, a highly touted freshman outside linebacker, suffered a separated right shoulder when he lost control of his scooter while returning to his dorm from church on Sunday. He is expected to miss practice until at least next week.

And how, exactly, do you lose control of a scooter? Maybe it's because I haven't used one very much, but they don't look like the hardest thing in the world to control.

Derek Dooley tries to use classical works to reach his players
There's renaissance, there's eccentric and there's just plain goofy. I'm not sure where Derek Dooley's idea to try to get his players to understand football points through Shakespeare falls. But how's it working out?

"Sometimes you know exactly what he’s talking about and sometimes it’s like, ‘I don’t really know where you’re going with this.’ "

Especially when he tried to use Hamlet's "to be or not to be" monologue to try to explain the end of the North Carolina game. Then again, it could just be that last year drove him insane and the Shakespearean references are just another step on the road to a rubber room.

The price of failure? About $1.5 million a year
Congratulations, Mike Shula and Mark Gottfried, in 2010 you were "two of the top five earners in UA athletics despite the fact that neither is still employed by the school," according to The Tuscaloosa News. Adding insult to injury? Shula's more than $570,000 take is offset by his NFL salary.

Golf tournament to benefit Desire Street Ministries
In addition to benefiting a great cause, the tournament is set to include Danny Wuerffel as a player, which is encouraging given his medical condition.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
Texas is not the only Big XIIish school starting up a network. In fact, Kansas State's new network will be in HD. That said, it's a digital network. And, well ...

But the school hopes the number of subscribers grows when the upgraded service debuts Aug. 30 with the Wildcats' volleyball home opener against Creighton. The network also will feature the Wildcats' football season opener against Eastern Kentucky.

Yeah, that'll work like a charm.