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Sprints Will Still Blog Saturday's Game From the Metaphorical Sidelines // 10.10.12

The Tennessee coach is undergoing hip surgery, while Kevin Sumlin is shutting down cameras for no real reason.

Scott Cunningham - Getty Images

'I'll take ominous footnotes for $1,000, Alex'
Derek Dooley needed surgery Tuesday for a fractured hip, so he will be coaching from the press box this weekend. That's not a small deal, as it limits his ability to call a timeout or oversee a hectic, last-minute situation -- not that Tennessee has ever had any of those under Dooley -- but it also seems unsafe from a career perspective. Why?

The last Tennessee coach to guide the team from the press box was Johnny Majors, who returned from a three-game absence after preseason heart surgery to lead the Vols to a victory over Cincinnati on Sept. 26, 1992.

Really, with all the talk surrounding Dooley's job security already, this is pressing your luck. No word on whether he will wear the orange pants up there.

A necessary waste of public resources
A few people who don't realize that a football game is, you know, just a football game are prompting police in Athens to step up patrols around a house used by some players. The police have to do this, but it's sad that they have to do this.

This seems like an overreaction
Apparently, "12 Man TV" caught a postgame celebration Saturday that was so hedonistic that Kevin Sumlin is shutting things down.

“There won’t be anymore cameras in the locker room,” he said. “That’s not going to happen again. But you got to remember 20 minutes before that we were losing by 10 points… It’s OK to celebrate.”

Wow, this must really be something. Liquor? Drug use? Running gun battles? Hardly.

Oh. Okay.

Thoughts and prayers to Bo Wallace's family
I'm not sure whether there are more of these situations or we're just hearing more about them now, but Wallace's sister broke her neck in an automobile accident Monday. The story says her doctors are "optimistic she'd have a full recovery."

As long as there wasn't a volleyball player in the car, he's fine
Seriously, does no one in Fayetteville know how to drive?

The utility of cowbells
Apparently, they're for more than just annoying the heck out of visitors to Starkville. Not that anyone in Starkville knows this. Instead, it comes from Dallas Thomas, a Tennessee player from Baton Rouge, whose mother has one.

“She had that cowbell since I started playing football,” Thomas told reporters today. “She told me this is how you know you can find me in the crowd when I played in big games. She would ring it and I would look for it and see her.”

They say victory has a thousand fathers, so maybe this does explain the cowbell phenomenon at Mississippi State games.

Belk is releasing a Cam Newton fashion line
I couldn't even make that up if I wanted to. It's being called "MADE Cam Newton," because "SMILE Cecil Newton" would have been a bit obvious. According to the press release, Newton "said" this:

“As a man born and raised in the south, I have always known Belk as a benchmark for quality apparel and a destination for clothing that is both functional and stylish. Developing a collection for Belk was a natural fit from the beginning, and we designed the MADE collection with an authentic approach,” said Newton. “I’m happy to bring my vision to a clothing line that provides comfortable, on-trend clothing to men and that reflects my personal style.”

Have fun with this one.