Warning: Some of the excerpts from the police report mean this is not a family-friendly post. Nothing about this sorry episode is family-friendly.
'I am the Athletic Director of the University of Georgia'
That might have been one of the few honest things Damon Evans said over the last 48 hours. Because when you compare the entire police report with his "apology" on Thursday, it is impossible to escape the only thing you can accept with your common sense intact: He was lying.
Not just on Thursday, though that is almost established by the police report. His relationship with Courtney Fuhrmann, "just a friend" at the infamous press conference. It just doesn't match what the police officer saw. Evans improbably tried to keep up the facade, but how is it credible?
I also noticed that the subject had a pair of red lady's panties between his legs between his legs. ...
I asked the subject what her panties were doing in his side of the seat and he stated, "she took them off and I held them because I was just trying to get her home." ...
I asked Ms. Fuhrmann how long they had been seeing each other and she stated, "only a week or so."
'I am the Athletic Director of the University of Georgia'
What is striking in the report, once you read it in its entirety, is not necessarily the tawdry details -- though those are certainly enough to catch your attention, enough to make you wonder what the hell Evans was doing and how he thought he could get away with it. What is striking is the cavalier attitude toward the law and the consequences, the entitlement.
"I am not trying to bribe you," Damon said -- but we all know he was. There was no other conceivable reason to even bring up his position at the University of Georgia; he certainly didn't want to advertise it. He thought it was his ticket out of jail; he seemed to believe until the end that his title could save him from the inevitable consequences of being drunk on both alcohol and power.
The subject stated, "I feel pretty good," smiled and laughed for no apparent reason. ...
"I don't want to use who I am, but I would just ask that you take me to a motel." ...
The subject also stated, "we go through life and we all drink and jump in a car."
'I am the Athletic Director of the University of Georgia'
Not for long. At least not in a reasonable world. Again, I'm not a member of the UGA community -- but even in a world as dominated by the "see no evil" attitude toward people who "do a good job" as ours is, it's impossible to see Evans surviving this. Not just because of the lurid tales in the police report. Not just because of the non-bribe. But because of those 13 words: "we go through life and we all drink and jump in a car."
Are there hundreds of times those word will be uttered this holiday weekend by passengers who will be pulled over by a law enforcement officer for the same crime? Yes. There are also going to be an unnecessary number of people who will never say those words, never speak any words again, because "we go through life and we all drink and jump in a car."
Is it unfair to Evans to face a different punishment than others might face, to lose so much more than anyone else is likely to lose if they get caught this weekend? It might be, but Evans wasn't concerned with fairness Wednesday night. Just look at his words.
'I am the Athletic Director of the University of Georgia'