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Sprints, For One, Welcomes Our New Robot Bulldogs // 11.25.09

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File this under 'Things I would not believe had I not read it myself'
PETA e-mails its idea for Uga VII's successor to Damon Evans:

In the wake of the untimely death of the University of Georgia's (UGA) bulldog mascot, Uga VII, PETA has asked the school's athletic director, Damon M. Evans, to replace the mascot with an animatronic dog--or to rely solely on a costumed mascot--instead of using another real bulldog.

Yes, PETA thinks the Georgia sidelines should now be patrolled by a robot dog. The sad thing is that they seem completely oblivious to how Ugas are selected. They say that "acquiring a dog from a breeder perpetuates the animal overpopulation crisis," which ignores the fact that the dogs are private pets that aren't "acquired" per se.

Still, robot dogs? (HT: Blutarsky)

Orson has a suggested prototype.

Common sense finally kicks in
Meanwhile, Evans appears to have learned his lesson about changing other traditions.

We have had some uniform changes in the past, but I will tell you not to look for that anytime soon. I’m not going to ever say never, but that’s not something we’re going to be focused on.

Wise man.

Really bad advice for Richt
Earle Bruce gives Mark Richt some terrible advice on job security.

When Bruce was told some fans are urging Richt to replace defensive coordinator Willie Martinez, Bruce said Richt better beware.

"That's the start of the demise," Bruce said. "The next step is you."

The one thing that everyone at Georgia agrees with is that Martinez must go and that Richt will be responsible for what happens if he declines to fire Martinez.

But, by all means, listen to an old Ohio State coach who probably hasn't watched a single Georgia game instead of your fans. Or you could just go ahead and resign now.[para]

Janzen Jackson to return Saturday
He's already back at practice.

"As I've said before, we wanted to take our time and get all the information in regard to his situation," UT coach Lane Kiffin said in a prepared statement. "These were very serious allegations and we had to make sure we handled this properly.

"After an extensive and thorough investigation by the Knoxville Police Department and the District Attorney's office, they've cleared Janzen of any wrongdoing in this situation and he had no prior knowledge of this incident. Janzen will join team activities today."

I'm glad this story had a happy ending. I just wish the same could be said for the other players involved.

Emmanuel Moody 'hobbled'
Inexplicably, this will likely not alter Florida's game plan all that much.

Cue season-ending injury
Mark Ingram makes the cover of SI.

Mullen on his reluctance to use the words 'Ole Miss'

"I just don't like referring to them by name," Mullen said. "I think it adds more. You could call them 'Mississippi.' I heard that one a lot. But I think we represent the people of this state, the people's university, the state university, so don't want to give them credit for that."

Dexter McCluster just added on another rushing touchdown for that one.[para]

I'm sure he's crushed by your criticism
Jimmy Johnson says no to Tim Tebow unless you actually do something new in the NFL. (Gasp! Never!)

I think that if somebody’s gonna draft Tim Tebow, they’ve gotta do one of two things. They’ve either gotta say, 'OK he’s gonna be an H-back, he’s gonna be a blocker and a sometimes receiver' or if I’m gonna have him as a quarterback, I’m gonna have to change my entire offense and probably oughta change my coach, hire me a coach who’s gonna run a spread offense and be able to use Tim Tebow in that fashion, but in a pro style of offense, I don’t think Tim Tebow can be successful.

I'm not certain that Tebow couldn't run a pro-style offense if he wanted to (there are actually several quarterbacks that do work out of the shotgun on at least some occasions in the NFL now), though that wouldn't be using him to the best of his abilities. I know, the spread offense won't work in the NFL, just like it didn't work in the SEC.

Urban Meyer would hire him to coach at Florida -- if, of course, Urban Meyer was still going to be at Florida after this year

The current Florida coach on a potential future Florida coach.[para] It’s probably my dream to have a guy like Tim … Tebow or (Ryan) Stamper, I guess, put the whistle around one of their necks someday to lead this great program.

I actually think Tebow would be an extremely good head coach. I'm not sure he would be a particularly good quarterback coach -- look at his throwing motion -- but I think as a leader of men and the guy making the decisions, he'd probably do all right.

Should Tim Tebow be a less credible Heisman candidate than Josh Nesbitt
Dr. Saturday makes the case.

A tribute to Michael Smith
Arkansas Expats sends him off in style.

BCS says Southern Cal's losses are just a flesh wound
The BCS announces which 20 teams are still eligible for bowls. I can't figure out whether this is an attempt to gin up playoff-type interest or something else.