Sprints Wouldn't Mind Being Paired With Erin Andrews. Professionally, Of Course // 07.10.09

Conference's wholly-owned subsidiary has major announcement. ESPN The SEC Network unveiled its broadcasting lineups today for college football games, including some not involving the SEC. (There are a few time slots left.)

Brad Nessler moves to the 7:45 p.m. games on ESPN, where he'll get to watch Todd Blackledge consume ghastly amounts of food drenched in grease. Erin Andrews joins them. This will hopefully be good news for SEC fans, who are used to seeing their games in this time slot.

So-so news: ESPNU's 7 p.m. guaranteed SEC games will feature Brock Huard and Eric Collins. There are worse play-by-play men than Collins. I don't know much about Huard, except that he came in second in an egg-roll eating contest preserved for posterity.

The regional games will have Dave Neal, who is horribly miscast with two people not named Dave. Andre Ware, a decent analyst, and Cara Capuano fill out that team.

Really -- we're not worth one time slot with Ron Franklin?

Other SEC notes: David Pollack will be one of the analysts for ESPNU's SEC Weekly program. Meanwhile, former Florida QB Jesse Palmer will be chugging the Red Bull, as the new schedule calls for him to do "pre-game, halftime and post-game analysis for every telecast on ABC and on the half-hour College Football Countdown at 3 p.m." This in addition to continuing his work on the Thursday night locker room know as College Football Primetime, still co-anchored by Chris Fowler and James with Andrews on the sideline.

The SEC will seemingly be spared from the commentary of Matt Millen ("Why are they running the QB? That's dangerous."), who will man ABC Saturday afternoons with Sean McDonough and Holly Rowe. This should often be a mid-rung ACC or Big Ten game, so don't worry about actually having to watch it.

Mike Patrick and Craig James will join Heather Cox for other Saturday afternoon games on ABC. I have a sneaking suspicion that, when Patrick asks what Britney Spears is doing with her life, James will know the answer.

All the other teams remain the same, including ABC Saturday Night Football's intoxicating brew of alcohol, fine cologne and women. But enough about Brent Musburger -- Kirk Herbstreit and Lisa Salters also return.

College GameDay remains the same, and the producers on ESPN will attempt to cheat the odds again and assume that Mark May will not murder Lou Holth as they team up again with Rece Davis for the studio shows.  

At least they still have all 14 quarterbacks
Tim Hawthorne, "just about the only wideout to receive consistent praise from their new position coach," breaks his foot. But -- yep, all the quarterbacks still present and accounted for.

Past depressions at Auburn
Continuing a banner day, Jerry also posts his latest "Review of DEATH," and is unsparing in his discussion of the 2008 Vanderbilt game.

I wrote in the game's wake -- and if there was ever a game that deserved the fallout be dubbed a "wake," it was this one -- that it was the most frustrated, the most angry I'd been watching an Auburn football game since Terry Bowden's final season, and nearly a year later, I stand by that.

Really? It's still worse than 36-0?

Auburn defeats Kentucky, 23-16
Well, that's the prediction from Track Em Tigers, anyway. The game hasn't actually "happened" or anything.

White Sox sign Jared Mitchell
This pretty much ends his college football career at LSU.

Arizona Cardinals ink Rashad Johnson
Three-year deal. No word on real or Monopoly money.

18 NFL teams watch Jeremy Jarmon workout
At least one pro scout says positive things about Jarmon. Maybe this saga can have a happy ending after all.

John Brantley speaks
Brantley thinks he'll have his own set of plays to run. Tim Tebow will be moved to linebacker on the following defensive series. Meanwhile, spurred on by the Tears of Tebow, Urban Meyer has the players running "the toughest offseason conditioning program the Gators have ever gone through." Voluntarily, of course.

Bobby Petrino gives $100,000 to Razorback Foundation
Two points on this: First, you know it had to be a one-year membership. Second, no, Arkansas fans, there is nothing special about this. Several head football coaches have done this.

Yeah, but you have to win them first
Red Cup Rebellion advises Ole Miss fans not to worry about the strength of schedule keeping them out of the national title game.

Because the Rebels begin the season at such a high point, they won’t have to worry about vaulting other undefeated teams in the polls. Basically, if Nutt and co. are still undefeated after the Alabama game, we're likely #2 in the country. Then it's all about holding on.

Generally, the time to worry about these things is not July. No, best to wait until you've won at least one game to worry about what might happen if you win them all.

Now, is this the whole thing, or just Part I?
RedCrake fills in for the Mayor nicely, writing an 80,000-word piece on the Georgia pass rush. Hey, anybody who still admits to thinking Joe Tereshinski would lead the Dawgs to an SEC title can't be all bad.

Gamecock Man counts down South Carolina fans' win wish list
Nos. 1 and 2 will totally surprise you. Just shocking.

Mystery around Arkansas basketball player
A TV report says guard Stefan Welsh is suspended indefinitely, but university officials will only say he's still on the team. This will do nothing to calm fears about an exodus from the program. HogBlogger at RazorBloggers puts it this way: "Something's Not Working."

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